Letters to Herme - Vol. 2

3/18/2010
Baby Herme,

Today is a big day. Today there are only 199 days left until, in theory, you are supposed to arrive. I have passed the 200 mark in the long wait to meeting you. Like I said though, this is all in theory. I suppose you will more than likely arrive fashionably late, just like your mama who cannot get where she needs to be on time. Ever. This morning while I was rushing to work I said to you in the car, “Herme, you need to be better about being on time to things!”. Take a page out of your dad’s book, getting places early is the way to go. Unless you’d rather show up like a tornado because you are rushing due to lack of time.

You are starting to become more and more real to me. I got to hear your heartbeat for the first time on Monday, and let me tell you little baby, I cried. Like a baby. At the doctor’s office. Awkward! Your dad had to work so he missed it, but I can’t wait for him to hear you as well. Your little heart was beating away at about 160 beats per minute, which is pretty darn fast.

I want to thank you, though it has more to do with hormones, but thank you for not making me sick. I have been feeling healthy and happy this whole time. I admit that I’m a bit more sleepy than usual – and I’ll also admit my “usual” is actually a lot more than most people’s “usual”, but I love to sleep! Most days I don’t feel pregnant at all. Now if you could work on not giving mommy stretch marks I’ll buy you a pony or something really awesome some day.

I just wanted to say that we are still so excited to meet you. We can’t wait to find out of you are a girl or a boy. I can’t wait to feel you kicking away from the inside, and your dad can’t wait until you can kick him on the outside. What a surreal experience that is going to be. Until next time, keep on growing little one. We love you!

Love,

Your Mom

11 Weeks

This week from The Bump we have a lime:

Your fetus currently enjoys a 1:1 ratio between body and head, and has skin so transparent that blood vessels show right through it. But fingers and toes are no longer webbed, and hair follicles, tooth buds, and nail beds are forming -- setting up a significantly more attractive future.

I need to apologize. I have been seriously slacking on my blogger duties! Not a lot has happened in the past two weeks to blog about though. I didn’t take pictures yesterday or today, but, imagine me from week whatever (when did I post pictures last??), and that’s me. I haven’t gained any weight, I still fit in my pants, and I feel wonderful.

With all of the feeling great you are probably thinking I’m just making this up, right? But I’m not, I swear. I had my second doctor’s appointment today. No ultrasound picture to share this time, but I did get great news. The nurse had me unbutton my jeans and lay back to try and find the heartbeat. She warned me that it still might be too early to hear anything. I lay there, expecting to hear nothing. She found my heartbeat right away, and then a second later found the baby’s. Baby McG’s heartbeat was around 160 bpm. I cried, and then wished that TJ didn’t have to work so he could have heard it too.

According to the old wives tales it is a girl. Supposedly a heartbeat over 140 is a girl, and less is a boy. And, the Chinese Gender Chart also says girl. I have a girl feeling deep down. My mom however would tell you she is 150% sure that I am having a boy. Hopefully we'll find out in the next few months for sure!

Until next time!

9 Weeks

I just realized that I skipped my 8 week post, and am about to skip my 9 week post also. Whoops. Annnnd, the battery in my camera is dead, so no pictures this week. I know you are all bummed that you miss out on my bloat baby! ;)

This week from The Bump we have a green olive:

Your little embryo has now officially graduated to fetus-hood. Adding to the excitement, a Doppler ultrasound device might be able to pick up the beating heart. With basic physical structures in place and increasingly distinct facial features, baby is kind of starting to look like...well...a baby!

So I am feeling Tony the Tiger Grrrrr-eat! Except for being tired at night, I still sack out at 7 o’clock on the couch. And the bloat. Ohhhh, the bloat! I had someone tell me last week I’m getting fat. Yes, pick your jaw up off the ground, that is what they said. Maybe not in so many words, but really, you shouldn’t tell a hormonal, pregnant, ragey woman that she needs to look into buying clothes soon. And you also shouldn’t give her the once over after you say such a rude thing. And, just so you know, rude person who I shouldn’t even care about anyway, I have LOST a pound since getting pregnant thank you very much! And you are a rude asshole. Ah, I feel so much better!

Back to the bloat! I will admit that even if the scale says I weigh less, my belly has this round little poochy thing that it didn’t have before. My mom and sister went shopping this weekend, they called me while TJ and I were out playing putt-putt golf on Sunday to say they were “Crazy Grandma/Auntie shopping.” My eyes lit up and I told TJ I was going to head over to mom’s house after golf and see what they bought. I scored! They bought me really cute maternity tops and two dresses (and some awesome baby loot, including a cute Elmo terry cloth robe with matching slippers. I almost died from the cuteness). Thanks to my friend bloat I am wearing one of my new maternity tops today, and it is sooooo comfy. My poor husband will never see me in a cute/tight/sexy top again. Hello muumuus and oversized shirts! Where have you been all my life?

We talked names a bit more this weekend. We are still trying to nail down a girl’s name in which we both agree upon. So far on our list of OK names we have: Lydia, Poppy, Allegra, Piper and Maggie. If it’s a girl we’ll probably use my middle name, Rey. We haven’t fallen in love with any of the names though, so I’m not sure we are quite “there” yet should Herme be a girl. Naming a person is super hard! Take my name for instance, I was never just “Jen/Jennifer”. Why? Because I was always Jen/Jenny/Jennifer C. My name was #1 the year I was born, and 25 –almost 26 –years later it is still in the top 100 baby names in the US. I don’t want my kid to have a totally outrageous name like Motorcycle (see previous name post and TJ’s bad sense of humor), but I also don’t want Herme to have the same name as half the other kids in his or her class. Don’t get me wrong though, I love my name and wouldn’t change it for the world, but I just don’t want to use something so popular.

I am 9 weeks and 1 day today, there are 216 days left to go (if this child should decide to arrive "on time").

If You're Reading This

Hello World! If you are reading this you are either, a) an other worldly awesome Bumpie who already knew about my blog, or b) a friend who saw my announcement on Facebook. So, hi friends old and new here! Welcome to my blog.

I have been keeping track, since August 2009, of TJ and my journey to parenthood. If you should choose to go back that far and read I will warn you that some parts of our journey are sad, but we are now on the road to our happy ending. I will also warn you, I created this blog while on a message board with other women who were TTC (which means Trying to Conceive for those who, unlike me, don’t spend hours online researching having a kid). There will be TMI, and if you feel squeamish about reading it then I apologize. ;) But hey, it’s my blog and I’ll over share if I want to!

So, a quick rundown of what you’ve missed thus far. Not a whole lot. I took a HPT (home pregnancy test) on January 23rd after getting home from work. I took a digital test as I don’t like to mess around with the whole, “Is it a line? Is it not a line?” bit. I was shaking with nerves when the word “Pregnant” popped up. I left the test on the bathroom counter for TJ to see when he got home. We had our first appointment, and first ultrasound, on February 19th. After that we told our parents, and started spreading the word. Which brings us to now. I feel great. I have, knock on wood, not been sick at all. Some days I feel a little off, but most of the time I feel great. I am super tired, and fall asleep most nights at 7 on the couch. I am pretty moody, though I wouldn’t say I’m more emotional, just more bitchy. And road rage? I has it.

There you have it. Should you choose to stick around and read through my journey, welcome aboard. If you were just checking out what I had to say, then thanks for coming! I hope to bring you some sort of entertainment over the next 31 or so weeks!

D Day

So today is D Day, Doctor Day that is. I had my first appointment, and it went very, very well. As you can see to the right. ;) That's my baby. Ah! Myyyyy baby! So unreal, but so much more real and tangible now that we know that things look good.

I was nervous this morning going into my appointment. Starting Wednesday I had very light, light, almost nonexistent spotting. With my history though any spotting in my mind is bad. So what did crazy, hormonal, pregnant Jen do? I cried on the couch Wednesday night. Like a big fat baby.

I told my doctor today that I've had some minor spotting, so she decided to do an mini-ultrasound at my appointment. TJ and I sat in the exam room while they went and got the little ultrasound machine. I became super nervous. The longer we waited in there, the more nervous I felt. She finally wheeled the thing into the room and got friendly with the wand. I cringed when I saw the look on her face. I just knew it was going to be bad news. Until she called TJ over from where he was sitting to look at the tiny screen.

She turned the screen so we could both see it, and there was our baby. It's tiny little heart flickering away. She measured Herme, and said she thinks I'm about 7 weeks or so. I'm sticking with my original date of 10/3 though, because I'm stubborn like that. And because how reliable is the measurement of that portable mini-ultrasound thing anyway? I mean, really! ;)

I cried, because I am a crier anyway. I think TJ's eyes welled up with tears. He isn't a very emotional guy, so the welling up was exactly what I expected. She printed out a little picture of Herme and the measurements for us and we were off, sort of. I went to the lab first and gave 6 vials of blood. Ick.

After we went out for tacos, because I was starving, we headed over to my parents house to tell them the good news. My dad was at work, so it was just my mom. When we walked in with a bag my mom asked if we brought her leftovers. I told her that we brought her dessert and pulled out her mug, still wrapped up. She unwrapped it and then cried. And then called everyone. So, the cat is out of the bag and it feels good.

Here are the pictures of the mugs that I painted a while ago for the grandparents. We are going to give TJ's mom hers this weekend. TJ took a picture of the ultrasound picture on his phone and text it to her, she called him very excited. It was a great day.

My mom's cup.

The bottom of my mom's cup.

My dad's cup.

TJ's mom's cup.

7 Weeks

This week from The Bump we have a blueberry:

Baby's brain -- both hemispheres! -- is growing fast, generating about one hundred new cells every minute. Arms and legs are emerging as joints start to form, and a permanent set of kidneys (baby's third!) is now in place.

Seven weeks! Wow! It's hard to believe that we've known for three weeks already that I'm pregnant. I know in the grand scheme of 40 weeks that three weeks is nothing, but, it has still flown by.

This last week was my "goal" week. Friday I was 33 days past ovulation, which is the same point I was at when my miscarriage happened in September. It is an immense relief to me to be past that point. My new small goal is to make it to our first appointment this Friday.

I feel great most of the time still. My boobs are growing and hurt like hell still. I only started to feel a little sick-ish on Friday. I'm having some minor food aversions, sausage really makes me queasy. TJ made a sausage and bell peppers dish the other night, and just talking about it now is making me feel green. I made myself a bowl of Cheerios yesterday morning and ended up drinking the milk out of the bowl and leaving most of the Cheerios. It's strange things that make me feel a little queasy, but thank goodness I haven't been sick.

I am finding that it's harder and harder not to tell people. I hung out with my mom yesterday after work and I had to bite my tongue many times. It will be a relief to have a successful appointment on Friday and tell the world about Herme. :)

231 days to go!

7 Weeks 0 Days

Letters to Herme - Vol. 1

First, I have to explain the nickname with a little back story. Prior to his or her grand arrival this baby will be known as “Herme.” Strange, right? Well, we aren’t really that normal around these parts. ;)

I was having a conversation with my mom before TJ and I had even decided to start trying for a baby. She was ready to be a grandma before we were ready to be parents. She would love to have a granddaughter to dress up, love it. We were discussing the fact that there is a 50/50 chance that my future baby will be boy or girl so she can’t bank on having a girl to dress up in pink. She told me should baby McG be a boy she would dress him in pink when she watched him anyway (real men wear pink, right???). I told her that I wasn’t sure TJ would like that idea, to which she responded, “What he doesn’t know won’t hurt me.” I hear “Herme”, and the name stuck. So, we can’t wait to meet you baby Herme! This is my first letter to Herme:


2/10/2010
Baby Herme,

This is an idea I’ve had since I was in high school. The idea of me being in high school is probably foreign to you I know, but before you were here I was a kid too. When I was in high school I read the book “Suzanne’s Diary for Nicholas” by James Patterson, and I thought it was a great idea. In the book Suzanne, the mother, wrote letters to her baby Nicholas through her pregnancy and while he was a baby. The letters had a sad ending, but, I loved the idea of it just the same. Someday I’ll give you these letters in hopes that you will read and appreciate them. Hopefully they will give you a glimpse into how much you were loved before we even met you.

On January 23rd our worlds changed. I’m still hesitant to say your dad/daddy/father or mom/mommy/mother, because right now this, you, still feels so surreal. Two and a half weeks ago when I came home from work, on your Grandpa’s birthday no less, I took a pregnancy test on a hunch. The result of that test, of course, is you. I sat the test on the counter in the bathroom and waited for your dad to come home from riding. He walked in the door and I told him there was something on the counter in the bathroom that he might like to see. I think there was a high five involved, but we were both very cautious. You see, before you there were positive tests and the results were not as good. So, your dad and I left the house for Grandpa’s Birthday dinner and we didn’t tell a soul.

As time has gone on we have gotten more and more excited. Things are much better this time then before. I really believe that in a very few long months you will be here and I will be holding you in my arms. I cannot wait for that day where I can see what you look like, and find out who you are. We get to hopefully see you next Friday in an ultrasound, and if it all looks good we’ll tell the world about you. You are going to be a very big deal, and a very spoiled baby. There are many, many more people than your dad and I who want to meet you. To hold you. To look you in the eyes and say, Welcome to the world, sweet baby. We love you, happy Birthday!

This will be my first of many letters. I want to thank you for coming in to our lives right when we needed it. You are a miracle, you are loved. Don’t ever forget it.

Love,

Your Mom